Thursday, May 13, 2010

My Story

"All of these lines across my face. Tell you the story, of who I am. So many stories of where I've been. And, how I've got to where I am. But, these stories don't mean anything, if you've got no one to tell them to. It's true, I was made for you."

Brandi Carlile croons these lyrics in her song, The Story. And, oh what a song... that lady has some serious pipes!

The reason I bring these lyrics up is because I've realized that I am getting old. Well, at least, older. I'm getting the telltale crinkles around my eyes, the darker sun spots on my face and hands. Some of my skin is getting crepe-y. I catch myself on occasion wanting to fight it! Fight these signs that steal my youth! Spend countless dollars on services to delay the inevitable! Alas, my budget won't allow for fancy treatments or plastic surgery and I wonder if I'd go back to smoother skin if it meant that I would have to erase the many smiles that created the permanent crinkles. The hours worshiping the sun, playing outside and laughing with my friends, to rid myself of some age spots. The manual labor of gardening and massaging people, chopping wood, painting color on my walls... would I go back and do it differently, just to have the delicate, beautiful hands of nobility?

I don't think so. Actually I know I wouldn't. Every line, wrinkle, spot and sag is a story. It's my story. It's my experience, my memory, my life. It hasn't all been good, but it's been mine. Now, about those gray hairs springing up! Those, I think, are because of my son! :) But again, wouldn't trade 'em for nothing!

Here I am, sharing my thoughts and feelings through the medium of this blog, unsure if anyone ever reads it or even cares. But, perhaps it really doesn't matter anyway? I'm putting the words out there, the thoughts that may or may not hold relevancy for someone. I'm expressing myself and sharing my story, and like Brandi says, paraphrased, your story doesn't mean anything if you haven't someone to share it with....

So, thank you. Whoever you are, for letting me share my story, parts of me, the old and sagging parts, the young and invigorating memories... with you.